People who live in glass houses...

Today we're going to hear all about how Obama is second on the list of senators who took campaign money from Fannie Mae and/or Freddie Mac. McCain (and his spin machine, aka FauxNews) will drill this into your head. They will make it sound as though Obama has been taking big PAC money, that he isn't as committed to a grass roots campaign as he says. But what McCain won't tell you is that the money Obama allegedly took from Fannie & Freddie is actually almost entirely from individual donors who happen to have been employed by one of those entities. Given Obama has more than 2.5 million individual donors, it's not surprising that some are employed at Fannie or Freddie. In other words, McCain won't tell you the truth about the donations because if he did, he'd have no mud to sling.

Oh, and one more thing MCain won't be telling you: he took money "from" Fannie & Freddie too. And lets not even get into where his current campaign money is coming from (lobbyists) and who it is that is driving his campaign (lobbyists - more than 160 of them on his campaign staff). Oh how I wish I had a few million dollars to blow so I could do some mudsliging of my own. Because while Obama may be above it (and rightfully so -- he's right that campaigns should be about the isues), I fucking am not. Besides, wouldn't you like to know what dirty little secrets big money like that could unearth?

2007 Book List

Not an exciting post but wanted to get it off my bookshelf at Bookcrossing. Since I don't want to lose it I figured I'd stick it here. ;) FYI - should anyone see this or care, this list is incomplete....

Greetings from Jamaica, Wish You Were Queer by Mari Sangiovanni
Winter Solstice by Rosamunde Pilcher
The Fifth Goddess by Stacy Backauskas
Beach Music by Pat Conroy
Daisy Fay & the Miracle Man by Fannie Flagg
The Witch of Cologne by Tobsha Learner
The Hundred Secret Senses by Amy Tan
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Hot Flashes by Barbara Raskin
Must Love Dogs by Claire Cook
The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger
Blame it on Chocolate by Jennifer Greene
Lucia, Lucia by Adriana Trigiani
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants by Ann Brashares
Lethal Seduction by Jackie Collins
Be Cool by Elmore Leonard
Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer
The Family Tree by Carole Cadwalladr
The Street Lawyer by John Grisham
The Good Wife Strikes Back by Elizabeth Buchan
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl

OMG! OMG!

It worked.  It worked.  Now if I can only get rid of the stupid "sent from my..." yada yada yada tagline.   

That said, I almost feel as if I should explain, or apologize or something, for being so silly and lighthearted in these last posts when in my last regular post I was in sorrow, missing Cary.  I know I don't HAVE to explain and there is really nothing to apologize for but I'm still in the place where I feel almost guilty for being happy or for seeming to forget.  I hope someday to crawl out of this dark place and I have my moments (i.e. my last two silly posts), but sometimes the contradiction between what I feel and what I do strikes me in such a way that I have to mention it.  Call it Catholic guilt.  Call it mourning.  Call it whatever.  I just thought that after being so light-hearted I should mention that I still miss Cary terribly.  That I still have yet to go a day when I don't feel that loss.  That I still can't see the place where thinking about her doesn't hurt.  I'm not alone in this, that I know.  But sometimes I get angry when other people try to equate their grief with mine.  It sounds bitchy, I know, but Cary & I had a special friendship, and even though others miss her too, I don't think they really get the loss I've experienced.  They may have lost a friend they spoke to once a month or so.  I lost someone who was a part of my everyday life.   I know its unfair and perhaps inappropriate to belittle one grief or to compare one to another, but I can't help it.  Sometimes I just want to yell "YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW BAD IT HURTS."  Except with one person - Cary's sister (who we'll call Mary).  I often feel that my grief must pale in comparison to hers.  They weren't just friends or just sisters.  They were both.  And it all just sucks.  But I have gained one thing -- and that is a friendship with Mary.  We've been each others rocks.  Although sometime I wonder if we aren't helping each other through our grief so much as helping each other avoid it. 

In any case, back to my original point, I hope no one equates my lightheartedness with forgetfulness.  I haven't forgotten.  And I don't think I ever will.

Ok. So I'm behind the times. But I just learned I can blog from my crackberry. How cool is that? I might actually post on a regular basis if I can do it anywhere. No promises of course. And hopefully this will work.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

The Holiday of Life

Tonight, at a little local bar, some 30 or so folks who've known each other for more years than we care to admit, will join together to celebrate life and friendship and the fact that we are all, mostly, healthy. A group of 5 or 6 of these folks created this celebration in 1986. Then, it was celebrated on Feb. 19 no matter what day the 19th fell on. Then, it was an excuse to skip school and party. Then, it was held at someone's home. And then, it involved only a handful of folks.

This Holiday of Life, as we termed it, was celebrated with vigor for several years and then, real life happened, and the celebrating ceased. College and marriages and children got in the way and The Holiday faded away. Every so often, someone would mention The Holiday, but we never quite got around to making it happen. Life, it seemed, was too busy. Too crowded. Too overwhelming perhaps.

But now we've decided to bring back this most revered of made-up holidays because we needed reminding of how quick and fleeting life can be. How special good friends are. And how you may never get another chance to celebrate. We'd forgotten this in our race through adulthood. But we re-learned it all. And they were very rough lessons to learn -- taught instantaneously when my oldest and dearest friend in all the world passed from this life on December 14 after a very tough yet very brief battle with cervical cancer. I've lived life in a bit of a haze since that awful morning when my phone rang while I was driving to work. The haze is now lifting, but some days are still very cloudy.

But today is beautiful. Today, I will celebrate life. I will celebrate friendship. I will toss adulthood out the window and live in the moment like a child for tomorrow may be dark once again, and I'm preparing myself for a rough storm on the 19th (not only the original Holiday of Life, but Cary's birthday as well). But for one night I will try to forget my sadness and remember what it is to be free. For one night I will remember my friend without sadness.

Tonight I celebrate the Holiday of Life.

And if you happen to read this, don't think it strange, but I welcome you to share the Holiday and pass it along. You need not be part of my circle to celebrate life. Celebrate your own life, your own friends, your own memories. Because life is fleeting whether you grew up with the Holiday or not.

Its Bon Jovi Time AGAIN!

So after getting so ridiculously excited about Bon Jovi and having such an amazing time at the show last week, I figured, what the hell, and decided to go again. Plans are slightly different this time -- my seats suck ass, BUT my boss has box seats and INVITED US TO JOIN THEM! We were going to just try and sneak down, or just hang at the bar in the arena (the Prudential Center, brandy new in Newark, NJ, is awesome!), but now we might even get to hang in a box (or, rather, a "Suite" as they are being called). Plus - if that weren't enough -- DAUGHTRY is opening and I have loved him from the first minute I saw him on American Idol.

So excited I can barely contain myself. Don't even have time to get aggravated about stupid people I've had to deal with today. But that's another story for another time.

Did I mention...

I'M GOING TO SEE BON FUCKING JOVI!!!! Saw him at Live Earth - where he only did 4 or 5 songs, and still RAH-OCKED -- and just had to get tickets (still I can't believe I've never seen him before as Jersey as I am).

So - OMG - less than 36 hours to go and I am so sickly excited I can barely stand it. The only thing that could make it better is if my friend Cary comes. She was always supposed to come, but with her diagnosis, there was some question whether she could. Well -- she is in great spirits this week and feeling better than she has in a couple of weeks, so fingers crossed. We find out tonight. I'm thinking of bringing a print-out of this pic with me though when I visit tonight for the final word - as added incentive. :) Cause, seriously, can you say no to him and that bod?