Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Spot the Dick

Have you heard this story yet? About the 21 year old single mother Army cook who refused deployment to Afghanistan because she didn't have anyone to care for her 11 month son and is now facing possible criminal charges for doing so? Well, technically, she didn't refuse outright to be deployed; rather, she failed to show up on the date of her specific deployment claiming she needed more time to find someone to care for her infant child while she was serving abroad. Apparently, the grandmother had originally agreed to take the kid, but after having him the week prior to the mom's deployment date, decided she couldn't do it (the grandmother, it seems, is also caring for a special needs kid of her own as well as two ailing adult family members). The Army says it would never deploy a single parent without a "family plan" in place; but the mom's lawyer says that isn't exactly the truth and the mom had been told that she had to deploy regardless of her family plan and if the kid had to be placed in foster care, well then, so be it.

I obviously don't know who is telling the truth here, or what's gonna happen to this chick and her kid, but I gotta say, reading this story on the train this morning got me all kinds of worked up. At first I was like, "That motherfucking military! What the fuck is wrong with them? How dare they even think about sending a single mother into a war zone? Have they no fucking compassion?" And that led, of course, to me ruminating about how fucked up the fucking war is in the first place and how we should be done with it already. But then I thought more about the actual story, and although I still think the situation is fucked up (and that our Nobel Peace Prize winning President should really do whatever it takes to get us the hell out of the middle east), I can't help but wonder....

1. Where the hell is the kid's dad? He's not mentioned in any of the articles about this story. Not even a 'we don't know where the hell he is' mention. Who is he? Why can't he take the kid while mom is at war? Does mom know? Is there some other fucked up cover-up going on here?

2. Mom joined the Army in 2007, her kid is 11 months old. So that means she, single and without adequate family support (I'm assuming since she doesn't seem to have anyone else to watch her kid for her), got pregnant and decided to have a baby while actively serving (and depending when in '07 she joined, potentially only months after joining). And presumably while knowing she would be deployed to a war zone; or at least knowing she was at risk of being deployed to a war zone. Um, hello, but WTF is up with that? Has this chick never heard of condoms? Or, duh, the PILL? 'Cause I know military insurance pays for the Pill. I know it for a fact. Did she do it on purpose? Is this all just a scam to get her out of the service which she VOLUNTEERED for? Why not just wait until your tour is done?

I'd really like to know the answer to at least some of these questions so I can decide whether to be pissed at the Army, or pissed at her. Because someone is being a dick here. I'm sure of it. I'm just not sure I can spot who it is. Can you?


~Kenny said...

You the funny thing was as I read that story the very first thought I had too was where the fuck is the father? or the father's parents. Really the bottom line here is the army should just discharge her. However, I would not doubt some stupid disenfranchised sergeant said something like "put it in Foster care". God Bless the Armed Services, but some of the people who go in are not the sharpest tools in the shed. There is enough stupidity to go around here. Another reason I would discharge her is even if she made arrangements how effective is she going to be in a combat zone knowing she is the single supporter of an infant back home. I would not want her watchin' my back. I know some will find that offensive, but it has nothing to do with her abilities as a woman and everything to do with her mindset as a person.

LSL said...

I'm anxious to figure out who the dick is in the situation myself. I was quick to blame the stupid military, but there might be enough stupid to spread around here. I disagree with Kenny's comment about not wanting her watching my back in the military - those folks have a lot on their minds all the time and do a hell of a job. By his logic we would need to discharge all single parents, and then, who is next? (Although I do agree with the "spirit" of his comment.) I appreciate the questions you raised.

PS When the hell are we going to meet for a beer? It seems like it needs to happen. Next time I'm in your area.