Parking Place

Time once again to park my annual book list in a place where I can come back to it, should I ever feel the need.

So here it is, the books I read, re-read or started to read but couldn't get through for the year 2011. Needless to say, I had a lot of time on my hands....and yes, I managed to get myself addicted to the Sookie Stackhouse books. I've been addicted to True Blood for a while now so I figured it was about time I tried the books. Well done Ms. Harris, because I can't put them down once I start (which is how I managed to blow through all 11 of them in a less than 2 months). And of course now I've turned my attention to another Sookie-type series. One of these days I'll get back to the classics. Who am I kidding, I love a nice trashy novel!!!!

The Books:
Brava, Valentine by Adriana Trigiani
The Book of Names by Jill Gregory & Karen Tintori
I Love Everybody, and Other Atrocious Lies by Laurie Notaro
Dead and Gone (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 9) by Charlaine Harris
From Dead to Worse (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 8) by Charlaine Harris
All Together Dead (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 7) by Charlaine Harris
Definitely Dead (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 6) by Charlaine Harris
Dead as a Doornail(Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 5) by Charlaine Harris
Dead to the World (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 4) by Charlaine Harris
Club Dead (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 3) by Charlaine Harris
A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole
Pictures of You by Caroline Leavitt
Living Dead in Dallas (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 2) by Charlaine Harris
Dead Until Dark (Sookie Stackhouse series, Book 1) by Charlaine Harris
The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
The Abortionists Daughter by Elisabeth Hyde
Absurdistan by Gary Shteyngart
Later, At the Bar by Rebecca Barry
The Dove Keepers by Alice Hoffman
My French Whore by Gene Wilder
Very Valentine by Adriana Trigiani
Son of a Witch: Volume Two in the Wicked Years by Gregory Maguire
The Help by Kathryn Stockett
Snooki In Wonderland: The Improved Classic by Phil Edwards (& Lewis Carrol)
A Clash of Kings (A Song of Ice & Fire, Book 2) by George R.R. Martin
Game of Thrones (A Song of Ice & Fire, Book 1) by George R.R. Martin
Herland by Charlotte Perkins Gilman
Palm Trees on the Hudson: A True Story of the Mob, Judy Garland & Interior Decorating by Elliot Tiber
Life, Love, and a Polar Bear Tattoo by Heather Wardell
Blue by Lou Aronica
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
Little Bee by Chris Cleave
Millie's Fling by Jill Mansell
Look Again by Lisa Scottoline
Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramhansa Yogananda
The People of the Mist by Henry Rider Haggard
The Year She Fell by Alicia Rasley
Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
Mossy Creek by Deborah Smith et al.
The Dress Lodger by Sheri Holman
How to Be Lost by Amanda Eyreward
Major Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson
We Thought You'd Be Prettier by Laurie Notaro
A Taste of Magic by Tracy Madison

My new faves....

We've been in AZ 3 months now and in that time I've developed a few new favorite things. So here they are....

• Spicy Ranch Salad Dressing. They don't sell this back east. Don't know why, because its crazy delicious.
• Green Chiles. Another item you can't find back east. Also crazy delicious. For those not in the know, green chiles are green but they are not the least bit spicy as one would expect from a "chile". Instead, they're almost sweet. Very flavorful. And they put them on everything here....burgers, chicken, salad, EVERYTHING. And they are now a staple in our kitchen.
  
• Grocery Gas Rewards. Usually, 10 cents off per gallon for every hundred bucks you spend at the grocery store. Some stores let you combine rewards to get as much as a buck off per gallon! And since grocery stores here sell beer, wine AND booze, you can rack those points up pretty damn quick. Here's how it works: buy groceries using one of those store discount cards and BOOM, you get discounts on gas -- either at the grocery store's OWN gas station (yes, the grocery stores have their own gas stations) or, with one of the larger grocery chains, you can even get gas discounts at the Circle K.
• Living in an Apartment. Granted, I've done this before but never in such a nice apartment and never in such a large apartment community. We've got 2 pools, a top of the line gym and the most amazing service staff. Got a problem with a running toilet? Jump online, place a maintenance request and BAM, less than 24 hours later, no more problem. Definitely faster than I could ever get the DH to fix anything. THe only problem -- we're on the third floor with no elevator so bringing up all that booze from the grocery store is a bit of a pain in the ass.
  
• American Horror Story. Ok, so this has nothing to do with AZ, but since I'm listing favorites, I couldn't not list my new favorite show. One of the best new shows in a long long while. The first season just ended...if you haven't seen it, you need to find a way to catch up.
• The Sookie Stackhouse Novels. Yes, I'm way behind the times on this. And again, yes, this has nothing to do with AZ, but I'm in love with these books. Or maybe the better word would be obsessed. Massively, don't-sleep-at-night, obsessed. Thank god for e-libraries & the option to download to kindle or I'd end up broke, considering there's like 473 of the damn things. :)

I suppose that's it for now. I'll be back soon. Another unemployed friend of mine has inspired me to blog more. If nothing else, it'll kill the time. You can only clean your house so damn much, ya know.

Happy St Patrick's Day!

Time to get my drink on. Although I'm not Irish. Not even a little. Except by marriage. So I suppose I do have a little Irish in me, from time to time anyway. ;)

Yeah - that's right....tasteless jokes are starting early this fine Paddy's Day morn.

And so in that vein....here's my favorite toast/Irish blessing of all time:

May those that love us, love us.
And those that don’t love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he doesn’t turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we’ll know them by their limping.

Lost Lessons from Footloose

In 1984, the movie Footloose was released. You know you know it. Kevin Bacon? Lori Singer (of Fame fame)? Crazy Christian town that has a ban against dancing? Don't be shy. You know what I'm talking about.

When I first saw this movie (somewhere around the time it was first released -- fuck, I may have even seen it in the theater), I fucking LOVED it. That much I remember. But its been ages, probably decades, since I last saw it so the details are a bit fuzzy.

But tonight I couldn't sleep. And there, on HBO Family, there it was. Had something else been available for my insomniac viewing pleasure, I might of skipped over it. But it was the best thing on (which actually says something pretty shitty about late night TV). And so here I sit, wishing for sleep, and watching.

And the crazy thing is....to my own surprise, I realized how political this movie actually is. Was. Whatever.

My point...Um. hello. Crazy right wing psychos forcing their religion down the throats of everyone else? Sound familiar? It could be the same fucking bullshit that is floating around today except instead of dancing, the question now is whether poor raped women should be able to get abortions on the public dollar. Not exactly the same, I know, but its still the same religious fucking douchebags trying to force their beliefs on everyone else.

Anywho, 1984 was quite a while ago, and yet tonight I realized that Footloose still has a few things to teach us (apparently because our society is led by a bunch of ignoramuses who can't learn from the past)...

1. It is SO not cool to punch your girlfriend. No matter how cute you are. And whether she was talking to another guy, as liberal as he may be, or not.

2. Book burning is bad. Even preachers agree. (On a side note.....yes, you are allowed to control what your kid reads. Of course you are. They're your kids. BUT, you are NOT allowed to control what MY kid reads).

3. The devil is not found without. He (or she or it or whatever -- I'm nothing if not an equal opportunist) is found within. So stop projecting you silly silly religious wingnuts.

4. People will follow the shittiest, most draconian, bullshit rules for no other reason than they're afraid to confront the status quo. Kind of like gays raised in Republican homes.

5. One person can make a difference. At least on a small scale.

6. Dancing can be good for the soul! (Even the bible agrees -- for example....."a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance" Ecc. 3:4; "Let them praise his name with dancing" Psalm 149:3; "Thou has turned for me my mourning into dancing; though hast put off my sackcloth and girded me with gladness" Psalm 30:11)

There are probably others, but I'm already up WAY past my bedtime and am done thinking for the evening. Feel free to share your own Footloose Lessons in the comments. :)

2010 Book List

The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown (on Kindle)
The Chocolate Chip Cookie Murder by ?? (on Kindle)

Mr. Golightly's Holiday by Salley Vickers
Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh (gave up on)
The Survivors Club by Lisa Gardner (borrowed from lending library @ Bay St Station)
The Girl Who Chased the Moon by Sarah Addison Allen
Stalking Susan by Julie Kramer (borrowed from lending library @ Bay St Station)
Songs for the MIssing by Stewart O'Nan
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest by Stieg Larsson (not yet registered)
The Girl Who Played with Fire by Stieg Larsson
The Double Bind by Chris Bohjalian
The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards
The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer & Annie Barrows
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson
One Day by David Nicholls
Home to Big Stone Gap by Adriana Trigiani
Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen
Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen
Wetlands by Charlotte Roche
Burn This Book and Move On with Your Life by Jessica Hurley (bookray with a twist...http://www.bookcrossing.com/forum/20/6419292)
Wild Meat and the Bully Burgers by Lois-Ann Yamanaka
Bitter is the New Black by Jen Lancaster
Learning Curves by Gemma Townley
Captain Corelli's Mandolin by Louis de Bernieres
Lovers and Players by Jackie Collins
The Third Angel by Alice Hoffman (not yet registered)
The Bad Behavior of Belle Cantrell by Loraine Despres

17 Days of Thanksgiving

So I've seen this meme a few places....usually its says 25 days of Thanksgiving. Since T-day is the 25th this year, I assume. But I'm a slow starter and so rather than go back for 8 days, I figured, what the hell, I'll start today. I don't mean to be overly serious here or too self-analytical. Its really just an excuse to get me blogging again now that my stay in hell (aka the Millennium Hilton) is finally over. So....with that in mind....here it goes.

Today I am thankful for seamlessweb.com. Because it means never having to leave the building or talk to the take-out places who never seem to understand me. An online take-out ordering service may seem like a frivolous thing to be thankful for, I know, but what can I say. Sometimes I am just a frivolous girl. Besides, seamless is the shit. If you live or work in NYC, DC or a bunch of other cities it services, and haven't tried it yet, you should. It will change your life. For reals.

A Little Screwed

If you've stopped by to visit recently, you would have "heard" me rant about a particular little chef who owns a particular little restaurant in a particular little town in a relatively small state (yeah, that would be Jersey. Duh. Did you read the intro to this blog?).  Well...this particular little chef, who also happens to be on this particular little TV show, was actually kind of stinking it up on the tellee for two weeks running. Like I said.

And then last week, she pulls out a juicy and tasty Thanksgiving turkey. Using a fucking toaster oven, no less. And while she doesn't win, she does get big fat praise from the judges. And I start thinking...crap. I should probably get on making that rez. But of course I don't. Because it's not enough that I've got a crazy job, I've got to add random party planning and shit to the list. So, like I was saying...rez doesn't get made. But so what, right? How many people have even heard of Montclair, NJ, right?

And then fucking TaNIGHT. The fucking bitch has to go and win the god damn Today Show challenge. Not any regular old run-of-the-mill fucking challenge, no! The TODAY SHOW CHALLENGE. And with a freaking caprese salad of all things (my favorite. figures.). And I think, "fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck." ( while, of course, also being silently proud as hell of my ass kicking "old lady" Jersey girl!!! - her words not mine)

Now, I'm not upset that she won with a salad. More power to her -- hell, that was a crazy smart decision (Um, let's see....I've got 2 1/2 minutes to present a dish...what do I make? Ummm, duh, salad! And c'mon, who doesn't like 'muzzarel' & tomato, especially when there are tasty ass Jersey tomatoes involved?) My problem isn't that she made a salad. It's that those dumbass bitches on the Today Show picked a salad to win. Cause now Ariane is going to be on the fucking Today Show with lord knows how many people watching (and that's not even counting myself) and I'm thinkg she's prob.abaly going to mention her particular little restaurant, which just happens to be a mere 17 fucking miles from the fucking Today Show studio. Great. Just great. If it was hard to get a reservation before, it will be fucking impossible now. So yeah. I think I may be a particularly little bit screwed.

Reservation for Two Please

Ok. So its Top Chef NYC, Elimination night #2. Ariane Duarte, owner of CulinAriane in Montclair, NJ, is still standing. Barely.

For the second week in a row, Duarte has been in the bottom three. Tonight, it was as of a result of her Lemon Meringue Martini with Cherry Surprise, or whatever the fuck it was called. In explaining why the dish sucked, she actually said that they have this on the menu at her restaurant. A restaurant which, I might add, has quite a good reputation in the 'clair. It's so well regarded, in fact, that a friend of mine actually expressed dismay after learning that Duarte was on Top Chef because, as she put it, it was going to be even harder to get a reservation at CulinAriane then it already was. So yeah, the place is supposedly pretty effin good. Of course, I've never eaten there, but I've been meaning too. But obviously it's not one of those, hey, let's go grab a bite at yada-yada kind of places. (and did I mention that the joint is also one of the priciest in town?)

Anyway -- this meringue/surprise-dealy was apparently so fucking sweet that Padma (don't even think about asking me what she was wearing, cause I don't remember; or ccare; well maybe I care a little and I could check the DVR but is there really a need for more than one blog entry about what Padma's wearing?) What was I saying. Oh yeah, Padma actually spit the offending dessert out in her napkin! Right there at Craft. She might even have called it "violently sweet" (but that might be for some other as yet to come awful dessert). You'd think that if the biatch makes the dish every day at her own restaurant, that she'd be able to reproduce it. Right? Right? Cause - fucking excuse me - but I don't own a fucking restaurant, in fact I almost never cook, and there are dishes even I can reproduce in a heart beat.

The fact that this supposed Top Chef couldn't do what I can (and I'm not all that good of a cook to begin with) makes me wonder if I should even bother going to her restaurant. I'm sure that's a totally unfair jump to make -- from one or two bad dishes on some crazy reality TV competition show to over-rated restaurant -- I'm sure the food at CulinAriane is as good as it has been reported to be -- and it's much more likely that the multiple fuck ups are a result of nerves, or editing or timing or whatever-the-fuck, and not because Miss Thing can't cook. But, still, Duarte is not looking too good on the tellee. Two bad finishes in a row is never good.

And it's not just her cooking that isn't looking too hot. She's coming off as kind of a bitch. And a whiner. Of course, she's from jersey so i guess I should've expected that (well, not the whiner part -- we're usually a little more thick skinned around here -- I mean seriously - suck it up.) But bitchy -- duh, bitchy runs in the blood 'round here. Still, they didn't have to make the jersey girl the bitch. It's so cliche.

But whatever, Duarte's not doing much good for herself (or jersey girls -- hell. llo.) and she's probably not doing her restaurant much good either. Granted, I don't think they've referenced CulinAriane since last week (at least not out loud), but, COME. ON. if you owned a restaurant. And you were on Top Chef. And you made a total failure of a dessert. Would you really admit that you sell the SAME dessert in your restaurant? Really? Cause I sure as hell wouldn't. Lord knows who's watching. C'mon lady, You. Are. On TV. All the time. And they can do whatever they want with your image -- do you really need to give them ammunition? Because maybe the average Bravo TV watcher could give a shit about some tiny-ass-little-joint in some no-one's-ever-heard-of-it jersey suburb, but you can bet your ass that folks around here are sure-as-shit watching. And that can't be a good thing. (This is Jersey after all. Like I said, bitchy runs in the blood here and it's no secret that we're all a bunch of retched bitches just waiting to talk smack about someone.) Then again, maybe it is a good thing. Well, maybe not for Duarte and her restaurant. But it could definitely be a good thing for me because then maybe I could get a fucking table at a normal dinner hour sometime before next year. So, hell, bring on the smack talking Jersey. And everyone else for that matter. Cause I just HAVE to try Lemon Meringue Martini, Vanilla Wafer Crust, Cherry Surprise. Even if Padma hated it. Maybe even because Padma hated it.